Unexpectedly Thrown Off

Anniversary dates, such as February (Luke's month) and March (Lily's month) being back-to-back can throw me off and make me feel dazed until late spring. But there are also random and unexpected things that can throw me off...

When I was in Virginia recently, my family and I ate at a neat restaurant that is down the road from where my brothers used to live. As soon as I walked in, I had this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't put my finger on it. My mind and my heart were remembering something in my subconscious before I understood what it was.

This is the place where I came with a friend 6 1/2 years ago to use the internet to research abortion methods, something that before that day, I was largely uninformed about. I was trying to decide what abortion I needed to get myself. The sickness of the situation mixed with the nausea of early pregnancy were pronounced memories that made me feel sick all these years later.

How could that have really happened?